Sunday, June 03, 2007

To the Ministry of P&W, I'm Sorry! I repent!

This is in response to the comments made by a representative of the Ministry of Power & Water on how we, citizens of the Kingdom of Bahrain are consuming more power than was anticipated or is allocated to us and thus we being the main cause of the power black-outs.

SO, I humbly apologies on behalf of all the misguided Bahraini souls who thing it’s their god given right to live.

I for one am taking complete responsibility for my contributions in disrupting the Country’s power supply; I now understand how precious this resource actually is and why I should not be in the class of people that should benefit from it.

I now repent my misguided actions and am a born again Bahraini citizen (X). I’ve changed my old ways, taking into account your wise words of encouragement on how not to take away the resources that were meant for others.

To that effect, I have now stopped turning on all the air conditioners in the house; even if it is blistering hot outside & in, and the rooms feel like the insides of saunas; I now know that I do not have that privilege. So what I have decided to do is herd all of my family members into one room, and only turn on the air conditioner in that room and no where else, for half an hour between intervals of three hours each. That would mean that we only have the air conditioner on for a total of around 3 to 3 & half hours a day, the rest of the time we will sweat our a$$e$ off.

Also, I have decided that it’s not only the power supply that my existence is leaching off of but also water.

Therefore, I have decided the following;

a) We will flush the toilet only once a day; every one in the family has been instructed to perform their bidding, irrespective of whether the bowl is empty or not, and the accumulated pile of excrements will be flush down simultaneously in one giant pull of handle all at once. IS 3 AM A GOOD TIME TO DO SO? We want the time to be authorized so that our waste does not disturb other peoples waste as it passes through the sewer system. AGAIN SORRY FOR THE UNTENDED INTERFERENCE.

b) Also, we have applied a quota system and limited the amount of water that each one of my family member is allowed to use when showering, a liter of water will suffice. Additionally, we will be pulling straws out of a hat and the unlucky person who pulls the shortest will forgo their right to shower on that day; this saves an additional one liter a day.

I am also considering skipping a couple of days of showering if the need arrises; I’ll just ignore my misguided colleagues when they comment about my hygiene; hell, to them I might stink after not showering for a couple of days, but to me it will be the sweet smell of satisfaction of knowing that I and one of the few citizens that have their priorities straight.

So what say you?

Will this suffice to ensure that the power does not get disrupted again?

Next I will be responding to the comments that ‘the unemployed are expecting too much from the Government’.

(Sarcastically)

I AGREE!