Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Lying your way to THAILAND!

This is rather funny; i've always believed that if you lie, for whatever reason, you'll soon find yourself telling another one just to cover your first, then another and another, leading to a chain that goes on and on until you get tired of lying & fess up.

Alas, there are also times where people are soooooo crooked that they will never confess, others may be even better, to the extent that sooner or later the lie becomes fact, even if they are caught red handed.

For example, a friend of mind told me of the following; he and his wife were at the airport on their way to Thailand, for a 10 day vacation when he saw an acquaintance. After saying their hellos', the acquaintance tells my friend that he is going to Australia to continue his studies. Well, fine and dandy, they say their good byes and depart.

When my friend arrives at the Bangkok airport he is surprised to see his acquaintance there as well. They smile at each other and my friend is told, by his acquaintance, that he was there on TRANSIT, before his plane departs to Australia.

Again, taking his word for it, my friend leaves the airport and spends the next 8 days sight seeing and traveling from place to place, when he and his wife get back to Bangkok, on the ninth day, he is surprised to see his acquaintance staying at the same hotel he is at.

They again say hello and then he asks 'How come he's (his acquaintance) still in Thailand', to which his acquaintance answers "THE PLANE GOT DELAYED AND I WAS PUT UP AT THE HOTEL UNTIL NOW BY THE AIRLINE COMPANY". What the hell do you say to someone like that?......

Alternatively, i have heard of even better (worse by nature) liars, note the following;
A man was fooling around with his maid when all of a sudden, his wife comes back early from her mother's house. Being in the bed room and having no way out, the maid picks up her clothes and runs into the toilet. The man is left sitting on the bed only wearing his underwear.

His wife walks into the room and demands to know where the maid is, he turns to her and squirts out the following in a drowsy tone, "SHE IS IN THE TOILET". The wife asks what she (the maid) is doing in the toilet, to which he replies, again in the drowsy tone, "HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW, PROBABLY CLEANING THE TOILET, ALL I KNOW IS THAT I WAS ASLEEP AND YOU WOKE ME UP". The dumb twit of a wife bought the excuse her husband had given her.............

But this one takes the cake; a women walks into her bed room, which is dimly lit, only to find her husband on top of the maid. She screams out " What the Hell are you doing?", to which he replies "OH MY GOD, I THOUGHT I WAS ON TOP ON YOU"!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't know how the last one ended but you get the picture.................

Monday, March 24, 2008

Is a Dumb @ss quick Fix the solution?? I think not!!!

The current proposal to grant Bahraini Citizen (with incomes less than BD1,500) a monthly assistance (aid) of BD50 to cope with rising inflation & hike in the price of goods, is still being tossed around in the Parliament pending final approval. I think it is being limited to only one year.

By my simple calculations, only 66,666 Bahrain individuals will be eligable each month. What about the other 944,444 or so that are excluded?

Do the MPs believe this aid is going to resolve the crisis, curb it in any way, or dampen the effect on our pockets?
Prices will continue to rise, good will continue to get even more expensive, and the freaking cost of living will be more unbearable.
Yet Dumb Ass proposals are being made by our ""highly educated"" MPs, who are convinced this quick fix is exactly what the doctor ordered.

There's a saying that goes something like this "Feed a man for a day & you will have to feed him tomorrow as well. But, teach a man to GROW his own food & you will have fed him for LIFE".

Why is this simple concept not easy for our MPs to understand.

The proposal will provide an additional source of income for some famalies, the benefits of which has already being nullified by rising rent prices & increasing cost of goods, which will then dry out by the end of 2008..!!!!

Rent continues to sky rocket, Food is becoming more expenseive, I SUSPECT THAT FUEL PRICES WILL INCREASE AS WELL..........WHY THE HELL NOT??..

There's more, land prices are phenominal, construction material has sky rocketed, the purchasing power of our currency has decreased drastically because of the PEGGING to the dollar....

I suspect alot of the price increases are due to GREEEEEEEEDD, not increasing supplier costs or transportation expenses....

All the MPS are recommending is a fix that is short term, i guess maybe up to the end of their Term in office......!!!!!!!

I don't profess to know the solution to all our problems, but maybe MPs should consider a Rent freeze, maybe a pre-approval by Government agencies before Suppliers of Consumer Goods, Services & Raw matterial increased prices (to ensure no price fixing and increases are justified). The immediate ban of the sale of Land to foreigners (inclusing other GCC nationals), allowing them to only purchase into the special residential schemes being offered. A matirx for Residental Flat specifications and the legal rent prices applicable basee on the location to be published by the government and adhered to by Land lords. Any one of the above suggestons, in my mind, would be better than offering the BD50 bribe to citizenzzzzzzzzzzz............

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Why i think women are much more tougher than us guys!

The fact is, i have a high threshold for pain; i've been this way ever since i can remember, be it paper cuts, splinters, bites, twisted ankles, EVEN A RUSTY NAIL IN THE FOOT, yet one thing i have never been able to withstand is hair removal using only tweezers or wax (the latter i have never used but am only stating to prove a point). I squint and tremble, then cry like a little girl (not a good example i might add, but you get the picture).

Remember the scene in the movie ' What women want', where Mel Gibson, calls women MAD, crazy or something like that, for using products to tear off /peal away excess hair.

So, being quite a rather warm blooded individual, i tend to require a little cleaning up performed on my eye brows, else a Uni-Brow matteralises below my forehead (Note: Uni-Brow, NOT UNI-BRA).

And so my kind, loving, caring and ever forgiving wife generously volunteers to pluck the critters off of the face of her simple minded husband, before he (I) is overcome (you'd think i'd know better).
NOOOOOO, nothing of the sort, in fact i'm such a dope that i sit through the whole ordeal, taking it literally like a woman, only, well, JUST, so my wife does not take me for a sissy.


But it does hurt....sooooooooooooooooo much......I'd rather take a bullet in the @SS.....

Women, give birth, bare most of the burden of child rearing and for some reason or another, sheer off the excess hair on their body without even a sweat......

MY HATs off to you women...

Tough as nails yet soft as a baby's bottom