Sunday, August 26, 2007

Teenage girls that put out, and give away the rest of their lives. WHY?

It’s not easy being born a baby girl, the transition from daddy’s little princess, playing with Barbie dolls, tea parties with little cups and saucers, learning about prince charming; to being a teenage girl at thirteen with raging hormones, a body that’s constantly changing, being told that it’s now natural for your body to bleed, "don’t worry you’re a little woman now", and that your body has just transformed into a baby making factory, keep an eye out for prince charming; to an eighteen year ‘Young Woman’, ready to venture into the world, any thing is now possible with the right education, determination and drive. Prince charming is knocking at the door but you are too busy perming your hair to hear.

Later on as a mature woman, marry the prince and live happily ever after, and maybe make a couple of babies along the way.

But life is not that simple, and we don’t live in Never Never land. There are too many variables; lives get ruined for the dumbest things…..

And so, I was watching the program ‘What not to Wear’ on MBC4, there was a 32 year old woman, whom you could not help but feel sad for, she has gotten pregnant when she was only seventeen, the first time she had sex was also the last time. This permanently scarred her to the extent that she no longer dated and had all but given up on finding a suitable partner to share her life with.


Peer pressure, the stupid love stories that they read, the romantic movies that
See, the sexually explicit music videos, the urge to grow up quickly?

Even with sex ED taught in a lot of the schools in Europe and America, public information about the sexually transmitted diseases, the sad stories of teenager’s lives destroyed by having sex and getting pregnant at a young age; it still does not sink into their thick skulls.

It’s hard being a single mother, bringing up a child all alone. By having a child early in life, during the high school years, many girls are unable to complete their education and find it even harder to get a good job to support themselves and their child. In almost all cases, the guy who gets her pregnant is not around, he splits soon after hearing the news, or tries to support and help out, but is too immature and the responsibility far exceeds his abilities.…….

Being a single mother is hard; lost youth, no hope of having a normal life, it’s a tough road up hill, but those who persevere get the best of a fruitful life. Some stick to their guns and take up the challenge and responsibility, other don’t, they give up the child for adoption; then go out with their friends, clubbing & boozing, and move around from partner to partner, not realizing that it can and will happen to them again, it’s just a matter of time.

Some of these teens, having become pregnant, hide the fact until it’s physically impossible, other are found out and are forced to abort; after the birth of the child, some young mothers, with the help of their family, take care of the child, others put the child up for adoption.

Either way, their lives will never be the same.

I blame the parents who have made it acceptable for their children to wears skimpy clothes, go out on dates, have pool parties; but the main reason parents are to blame is not making their homes a haven when the girls and grow up and mature into a responsible adult, tranquility is home is a must, a good father figure, and a mother as a role model to look up to, children need to be loved and nurtures, if they don’t find what they need at home, they’ll seek it in other places, by whatever means.

Some girls may feel that, by putting out, they will be respected and loved, only to find out that they were just another notch on a boy’s ‘belt of sexual conquests’; and since their virginity has now gone with the wind, they no longer have a reason not to continue with their promiscuous ways, like "cheap body spray, giving it away".

This phenomenon is not new to the Gulf, it’s just taboo and no one likes to talk about it. Not talking about, does not make the problem go away.

There are predators out there that tricked teenage girls, fool them into believing they live them and then, WHAM, BAM, thank you MADAM, NEXT………

During my school days, I had such a friend; he too had a ‘belt of sexual conquests’ that had seen a lot of wear and tear. The funny thing is, that today, he is a changed man, very religious, married and, guess what, he has three daughters.

Who said god does not have a sense of humor?

I guess the silver lining here is that, for every girl that does decide to take the fall, there are many others who decide it’s not for them. Their honor is not for sale.